It's no secret at our house that Mom's been suffering from a common, yet incredibly valid and unfortunately real, syndrome that plagues women on a monthly basis. Levels of "slightly irritable to ultra heinous" vary from woman to woman. Be smart and don't ask your significant other to evaluate your condition because he's totally wrong.
Evidence of my "condition" lies in the fact that I cried during my first viewing of HSM3 this week. Gabriella was headed to Stanford and Troy was going to stay in New Mexico to play basketball. Seriously, for a couple of minutes, I was totally messed. Other indicators:
- I'm living in a pair of black gaucho pants (or anything with an elastic waist).
- Simply thinking about chocolate... not tasting... just thinking about it, is making me gain weight.
- And my temperament, well let's just say it has been less than angelic.
So, If I haven't already ostracized the two males who read this blog, I think this next sentence will. It's time to "wean" Henry. And it has nothing to do with the fact that he's over a year. If a Mom wants to nurse her baby longer than age one, good for her.
Reason #1. I have made plans to fly to Salt Lake in May to attend the wedding of one of my closest friends of all time, Karina Stratton.
If you were at BYU-Idaho when we were, you may in fact poop your pants when you find out who she is marrying. I nearly did.
Completely well suited, Completely smittenReason #2. Henry seems ready. He's not as interested. He's drinking whole milk. He's (sniff, sniff) growing up.
I should be celebrating the fact that I'm, as other Mother's say, "getting my body back to myself"... but to be honest, I'm not "getting back" anything incredibly fantastic. You loan out anything to your kids and its bound to be returned in worse condition. Your body is no exception after a pregnancy.
I'm totally setting myself up to be made fun of, I get it. Simply put, I love nursing him. I love that time. When he was sick, I loved being able to comfort and nourish him simultaneously. Thoughts like these enable me to put off the initial "end" one more day.
Yes, I went through the same thing with Eliza with the major exception that I was pregnant with Henry during the time I weaned her, so knowing that my body couldn't handle both was motivation enough. Here's an analogy for you.
I feel like an X-man whose about to give up her super power.
Continuing with the theme of "letting go" here's and added dose of ridiculous. Part of the bargain in Andrew's decision to use his vacation time to accommodate my huge desire to attend the wedding is that I have to wean Eliza off of her binkie. I'd rather potty train her all over again than do that. Yes, she is quickly approaching the age of three. She's "too old" - but oh man, is she attached to that thing. I'm about to break her heart, and in doing so, will break mine.
As I digested these (sorry to be so dramatic) painful thoughts in the car today, I made a solid decision. Postpone both operations until my emotional health has returned to full strength. Any tips or suggestions on what to do or how I can help Eliza when the purple binkie is out of her sweet life forever would be appreciated.
29 comments:
It's so hard to stop! I still miss it! I LOVED nursing
When Kate got rid of her binki we had her trade it for something she really wanted. We told her the binki fairy came and took her binki but left her a big girl bike insead. She still had a hard time for a few days but it went better than I thought. Good luck with everything. Hope we can see you when you are here!
Brooklyn had her Binkie until almost 3 and only when she was sleeping. She knew that it was only for in her bed. the read push came when the dentist said that it was causing major damage to her teeth. (She had a noticable gap between her top and bottom teeth when she bit down. Anyhow, we blamed it on the dentist, took it away cold turkey, had a few rough nights but that was it. I think that the binkie fairy is a good idea. Good luck :)
My husband's mom (I guess that would be my MIL!) did the Binkie Fairy too, and Brian still remembers it! She told him that he had to leave it by his bed so another little baby could use it, because Brian was a big boy now. He totally bought it!
As for nursing, congrats for making it over a year! I think any time that either mom or baby/toddler is ready to be done, its okay to stop. I nursed both of mine until age 27 months and it just felt "right" to wean then. Good job, momma :)
Ali: My Katie had her binky til she was (ahem) 7. (yes, SEVEN) So I suck as a mom (no pun intended) However, taking it away was not even a big deal. (probably because she was old enough to read about why she shouldnt' have a binky!) We tied it to balloons and let it go in our driveway. She sat in the driveway at our Canyon Rim house for oh, about 30 mins, just staring at the sky. The Binky Fairy came that night--and about every night for a week or two -- with a little prize for her. She was fine. The rest of the kids were 3 when we took theirs away; we put them in the big outside garbage can and WATCHED the garbage truck come take them away. I would suggest also putting a few boundaries on binky time before the big bye bye. We did a few weeks of car only, bed time only, etc. before we went cold turkey. Good luck, from a Big Fan of Binkies...Shelly
(Sorry so long.Can you tell binkies are a tender spot for me?!)
I can relate with the nursing, it IS like a super power. I remember feeling like Sophie didn't even need me anymore. ANYONE could take care of my baby after she was weaned! But that's not true either, he's still love you most and NEED you... just not as often. :) Just think of all the NORMAL and SUPPORTIVE bras you will be able to finally wear again!
Taking the binky away was not near as big of a deal as we thought it would be, apparently we were more attached to it than she was! Good luck!!
When I lived with my brother, we sat Hunter at the counter and pulled every bottle out, and every binki. We took each one and cut the nipples off, in front of him. He was a little traumatized but he new that they were never coming back. Good Luck!!!
Ali -- it's not fair to have to deal with this just as Mother Nature decides to send her own practical jokes to you. Seriously!! If I were in a really mean mood, I'd pass on my mom's advice. What the heck, I'm in the same predicament! "Time to get pregnant again!"
(rrrr.....)
We never had the binki problem with Charlie, but the bottle was an issue. STill is, in fact ... he kifes Clara's every chance he gets! We got him off it by having him pick a special thing he got in place of the bottle, and then we rounded up all of the bottles and such to "donate to the baby monkeys at the zoo". They have these awesome "donation recepticles" all around ... they're also called garbage cans. IT worked like magic ... and he got a trip to the zoo out of it, too! AND the monkeys played along and had babies just before we went, so we got to see the babies that were getting the bottles. Good luck!!
That "ZOO" idea is genius!!!
Also, cute the nipples off and tell her that the binki fairy had to come and help her be a "big girl".
Oh, and if that doesn't work, bribe her with a chocolate ice cream cone. Worked like a charm for me, both with my thumb and my "blankie". That Gayla is a sly little devil. I was robbed for two bucks.
why does he look familiar?
I hated to give up nursing both times. There's something so special about knowing that you are giving your child something that only you can give.
Aidan was a binkie baby. He called it his "pa", and he didn't give it up until 3. At first we told him he could only do it at bedtime. Then, the "pas" starting disappearing (I swear we had like 50). Eventually, we had him trade the few that were left for a big boy toy. It was much less traumatic than I expected. At least it's a binkie and not a thumb. Marian sucks her thumb, and I have no idea how we'll break her of that when the time comes. It's not like I can take it away.
I got rid of Maelie's binki by accident. Back when I was paranoid of germs, I was boiling Maelie's binkis and forgot about them. Well, they melted to the pan, so I showed her that I was really sorry, all her binkis were broken. And she accepted it, she was fine. Of course she was closer to 2 than 3 so maybe Eliza will realize you can by new ones? Good luck! And good luck with weaning Henry... that is great that he is already on milk, Jaxon had a really hard time with it. And that's awesome that you get to go to Karina's wedding... who is she marrying? He looks familiar, was he in our ward?
I wish you the best of luck & a fun trip! How exciting! Weddings are always fun to look forward to :)
As for the pacifier situation, I have no idea what to tell you. Polly became uninterested around 18 months so we got off easy. Who knows what it will be like with Bruce...we might be in for a hard one, he hasn't been the "easier" of the two kids for sure. I had a friend that took her kids to the store & let her child pick out a toy & then "bought" the toy with her bag of pacifiers. She told the sales clerk ahead of time what was going on & they agreed to just throw the bag away & play along. Anyway, it's kind of a cold turkey idea & then you as a parent are left with no pacifier to "give in" when the going gets tough...
I didn't read a ll your comments, but I love the one with the balloons & the garbage truck! Best of luck with weaning yourself/Henry, Eliza & getting ready for the wedding, you will have a great time!
Thanks everyone for the great suggestions/comments. You have no idea how happy they make me.
My concern is that Henry and Eliza use the same brand of binki. Eliza has no problem taking anything from her brother.
i think that's what made it work for me...making sure I did it before Asher was born. Otherwise, it would have been so hard. I slowly let him cry it out during naps, and he only used it at night, and then, I just stopped at night. It took a couple nights of crying, but that's it. Since she's older though, I like the trading for something she really wants idea. Good freaking luck.
I love you to death, Ali! As for Eliza, Meg was the same way. We took her to toys r us and let her "pay" for a toy she chose with her binkie. We then got a happy meal and made the day a big deal. I just kept telling her what a big girl she was and how proud I was of her. She did surprisingly well with the transition. I am sure Eliza will too. Nothing to fear...right? ;D
Sadly getting sick made it so I didn't really have a choice about moving Zach to a bottle. I loved nursing and the connection. It was also really nice to know that I always had food on hand when he needed it. Good luck getting Eliza off her pacifier. I have no experience with that sort of thing yet.
I loved nursing too! Those first few weeks, or months in our case with the first baby is the only hard part about nursing! It really is hard to give up and even when Bo was practically pushing me away from him, it was hard for me! I get that!
Good luck with that! I wish I had better advice but I nursed Brielle until she was 15 months and she just weaned herself. And I only nursed Claire until she was 6 months becuase she was biting.
I also have no idea what to tell you about the binky. We cut the tip off of Claire's a while ago...but I gave in and gave her an uncut one back. I'm not good at following through, especially when it's so soothing to them. And sometimes the ONLY thing that will convince them to settle down.
I can't believe Stephanie doesn't recognize him! They look so cute together!
Since both of them use the same type of binky's I would be tempted to take both away from both at the same time. But what do I know Kate never liked a binky so I didn't have to worry. Since she is older try some of the other ideas.
As far as weaning goes, I wanted to wean Kate ASAP but once I did (at 13 months) I actually missed it. She never really cared. But we did snuggle some more to replace the bonding nursing gave us. Good luck, I say take it slow and try to drop the least favorite time first, wait a few days and drop another. The last one to go was right before bed and I replaced it with book reading.
Good luck!
I love nursing, too! It was so hard when my milk dried up with Marshall and that was at 9 months. Then my whole pregnancy I just looked forward to nursing a baby again and hopefully longer this time.
As for the binkie, good luck. With Marshall we were down to only one left and one night he was really tired and I couldn't find it anywhere. I told him I'd buy him one at the store next time and never did. He didn't ask for it that night or ever again. He was just over three. But, he also didn't have a sibling with one at the time. My little half-brother used to steal my half-sister's when they got rid of his. I've also heard of poking holes in it so it's not puffy and suckable anymore or cutting the tip off little by little. Personally I think cold turkey is just easier.
Someone told me a story of a little girl who wanted a tricycle. Her parents told her it would cost her three binkis. So when she went to the store to get it they asked the cashier to tell her it cost three binkis and she happily gave them away. I just think maybe find something she wants more and let her make a decision. But I wouldn't know. I am not taking linc's binky away for while... i'm scared to do it!
I nursed Maggie for 2 and a half years. We even went on a trip for long weekend thinking it would stop but it didn't. I came home and she took up her position right away. I loved nursing and I think it is a hard decisio to quit. Sam is the only kid that took a binki and he got an ear infection which made him stop sucking it. Although when he saw two new ones for his newborn sister he wanted to go off the wagon.
Join me on the FAT team Als.. Im gaining almost a pound a day here in Arizona.. IT IS SO GROSS!!!!
It's been awhile since I've checked your blog. But I was happy to see that you or perhaps, I should say your writing/personality hasn't changed at all. You are still as funny as ever. I absolutely love the comment you made about loaning things out to children and it coming back in worse shape. I had a good laugh over that one. Partly because it was funny and partly because now I understand what happened to my midsection and I can feel totally comfortable placing the blame where it belongs. I plan on sitting down with my kids tomorrow and telling them that my scary tummy is all their fault and that they will have to stand in the corner for awhile and just think about what they've done. :) ha ha ha. . . yes, I'm kidding. :)
Melanie never took a binki...ever! that was tough. Its so good to hear that you nursed him so long. I am still nursing my 10 month old Melanie and I am getting almost laughed at. Almost everyone here in Idaho doesn't for very long if at all. One of my friends actually had the guts to call it "GROSS" I'm with you I love that time I have with her and I KNOW its good for her.
You crack me up! I think I type that statement whenever I leave a comment, because you are so funny! I love the "loaning out your body" comment, you are about as witty as they come, my dear!
BTW nursing is the best...I feel for you trying to quit!
Hey Ali -
If you get this will you please email with tips on how to wean a child? I am being serious. I have a 16-month-old whom I loved nursing until about 3 months ago and now I can't figure out how to stop. She won't drink milk. She pretty much wants to take off my shirt all day long. I only let her nurse before nap and before bed now, but she begs for it all day. Making me nuts! Any tips would help. melissa.stringham@gmail.com
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